


All's fair in love and war

by Apatheticartst13



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Humanstuck, Love Triangle, M/M, mafia
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-04
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-14 15:02:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28547562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Apatheticartst13/pseuds/Apatheticartst13
Summary: Karkat Vantas is the son of a small town preacher going into college in his home town. That is until he catches the eye of the son of a local mafia boss.  Something he didn't even knew existed in his small little town. Sure his best friend sold small time drugs but he had no clue his real connections or anything like that. Now Karkat is in the middle of a tug of war with some powerful rich family and his best friend(Eridan x Karkat) (Gamzee x Karkat)
Relationships: Eridan Ampora/Karkat Vantas, Gamzee Makara/Karkat Vantas
Comments: 5
Kudos: 24





	1. Chapter 1

The streets smelled of car exhaust and complete bullshit, at least that was what was running through the mind of Karkat Vantas. The youngest in his family and possibly the most easily agitated in his small three person household. He had come out here with the intention of hopping in a few bars on his winter break back him. While he went to the campus in town and was never too far from his father it was always nice to visit during the holidays. But he was tired as shit and it was closer to three in the morning as he started to make his trek back home. Gamzee was suppose to wonder his high ass out here and fucking hang out with him. Hell he still had the guy's Christmas gift in his back pocket. Even if his odd clown religion or whatever the fuck he wanted to call his obsession didn't celebrate it.

Karkat just gave a soft sigh, pushing past his lips and into the chill winter air it was easily visible against the dimly lit street corner he stood. He had grown up in this town and so it was virtually impossible to get lost. But with his current slightly buzzed state he was having to stop every so often to get his bearings. However he knew well that he wasn't but maybe three blocks out from his little suburban neighborhood. He pulled his thick grey coat tighter over his black turtle neck sweater, the coat was at least good at breaking the frosty wind of the winters night. He ran his fingers slowly through his hair, his cheeks a light red flush from the nipping cold and the bubbling bits of alcohol in his system. Karkat had stopped to rest his head against the brick of the nearest building. To his left was a street lamp illuminating him like a spotlight, while to his right was the stark blackness of an alleyway.

Though the phone he pulled from his pocket illuminated his ghostly pale features well enough. He had a softer looking face, a small button nose and larger eyes that were only lined by darkened bags under his eyes. His hair was a dyed black from the white it was suppose to be. Even his lips were pale enough to almost blend into his skin like his eyebrows did. He would just look like he was made of snow if he didn't dye his hair a deep raven black. His brother was born with albinism as well, though he didn't hide a damn thing about it. His father was more ginger and his mother had dark deep brown hair, how they hell they made two monstrosities was beyond him. Those deep red eyes looked over his phone screen in absent vacant amusement as he scrolled through his social media.

The small college man had barely noticed the rustling from the alley way beside him. Let alone the man that had just walked out from the brick wall he was leaning on. Karkat could barely get a glance at the taller's silhouette against the dim streetlight and the light of his phone screen in his face. This was until the man waltzed his way over and quite frankly snatched the phone from Karkat's hands. Something he honestly never expected. He looked up as soon as his device was nabbed. The albino man glared up at the offender with disdain before he went off.

“What the ever-loving fuck do you think you are doing cockwomble?” Karkat practically barked at this man, his face twisted in a sneer before he went to nab his phone back,which was simply pulled away higher than he could reach. The man before him was lightly tanned, tanner than Karkat was, with large thick black glasses sitting at the bridge of his nose. Deep almost violet eyes stared down at him past his nose, quite literally looking down on Karkat. He wore an ungodly amount of rings on both hands, minus both of his ring fingers. Granted who the hell would want a pompous shit like that anyway? He had a strong jawline, which was only emphasized by clinched teeth, he wore a black sweater with blue stripped skinny jeans, not even a jacket on this man. He gave a board look as he rolled his eyes and began to tap away on Karkat's phone.

“Relax, I just need to borrow-w it for a moment.” The taller spoke as if it was obvious, he had a very slight accent to his tone and his shoulders stood tall with his back straight. He was not quite as tall as Gamzee was to Karkat but he was still well over a head taller. But the entitled air about him showed off enough to rub Karkat the complete wrong way. There was just something about it all that he hated. So Karkat lunged for the phone, being only about 5'3” sure as hell made for a disadvantage for this sort of thing. However it was not just the height that was against him, the taller did not hesitate to pull an actual fucking gun on him. He felt the cold metal pressed to his jaw before he realized just what it was. His heart dropped right to his stomach. “Don't try anythin'.”

“What- fuck alright alright, calm down.” Karkat spoke quickly, his palms out a bit. He felt as though he should be running, however turning his back to this gun-toting psychopathy with a stutter may not be the best call here. Karkat was used to his fair share of danger considering all the little back alley deals he had accompanied Gamzee on, but this? This was fucking insane. His head tilted away from the weapon as it was still pressed against his skin.

“W-well then you shouldn't mind me usin' your phone.” The man spoke coldly as he didn't seem that concerned truly about rater Karkat lived or died at this point. As long as he got whatever he needed from this interaction. His fingers nimbly tapped a few things on the screen one handed before it was pressed to this man's ear. As he spoke on the phone the weapon slid down Karkat's neck, the cold steel making it painfully obvious it was there. “I need a ride. Yeah... I'm off main. Cro I sw-wear to god, no just get here. Yes everythin' w-went fine.” He spoke to whoever was on the other end calmly, not like he had Karkat right there as some sort of backwards ass hostage. Though since he was so deep in his little conversation of who knows what Karkat took the slightest step back. Only for the sound of the clicking if the gun, a live round falling right into the chamber and ready to fire. The man narrowed those eyes Karkat's way, a warning it seemed. He took that warning extremely serious as he stood stiff.

As the call ended Karkat's hands were still up, palms still facing the other. Hell even despite the cold weather he felt as though he was sweating. He was so goddamn fucked. Though as the call ended his gun lowered and then was holstered at his side, under his jacket, concealed. Those violet eyes gave Karkat a once over, before he tossed him back the phone. Karkat stumbled but managed to catch it. “Fucking hell” Was all he could mutter to himself.

“You know-w, you w-were at least slightly of use.” The man spoke before he gave a light huff, his arm going around Karkat's shoulder as he leaned in. He gave quite the shit eating smirk Karkat's way as he practically hummed “You got a ride home? W-what's the sayin'? No good deed goes unpunished? Might as w-well help you out since you helped me out.” He was acting like this was of Karkat's own free will. Which was complete bullshit but he wasn't sure if he should call this asshole out.

“I can get my own fucking ride home. I'll just call my brother or something.” He grumbled as he now had his own phone, he had a message from Makara because of fucking course that clown was up this late, but nothing in return when he messaged Kankri. Of course not, he would probably be up at the ass crack of dawn. Not only on top of that he had this insane man that was strapped hanging off his shoulder like they were glued at the goddamn hip. “Damn it” Karkat muttered under his breath. Looks like he didn't have much of a choice.


	2. Chapter 2

Karkat was tired and still buzzed, being dragged about by some bastard with a gun at the ready to blow his brains out. To say he felt like he was in some real fucking danger was an understatement. He really was unsure what to even do with himself. He doubted Kankri was up and he really didn't want to get him hyperventilating over this either. The dumbass would go straight to the cops and Karkat would be dead before he even finished the 911 call. So he didn't even bother texting him, his dad probably wasn't a good option either since he would do about the same thing. So he ever so casually messaged Gamzee, more or less asking to crash at his place. Then he didn't have to give his address out and if he went missing the high ass clown hopefully will call someone... hopefully. If he didn't forget thirty minutes after the message. Though it seemed his captor seemed to notice Karkat typing away on his phone after a moment.

“W-what do you think you are doin. Those better not be lov-ve letters to sw-wine” The man spoke as he practically loomed over Karkat's shoulder. The smaller glared sharply but he pocketed his phone swiftly before the other could see exactly what he was typing. He wasn't looking to get Gamzee in trouble either in all this. He wouldn't give anyone's name out if he could absolutely help it. But it seemed this jackass was really interested on whatever it was and the fact he pocketed it so quickly rubbed the man the wrong way. He gave a raised brow, his expression pressing for more information on what all this was about.

“No I'm not contacting the damn police if that is what you are going on about. Since you insist so heavily on driving me home I am texting my roommate that I'm on my way. It isn't that fucking deep and you don't need to know anything else.” Karkat challenged him a bit as he says this. “Hell I don't even know your goddamn name.” He spoke up obviously frustrated by all of this. However this didn't seem to amuse the man all that much. That ghostly pale figure had a cute face but one of the loudest most infuriating voice known to man when he was getting frustrated like this.

“It's Eridan, not that you really need to know-w that.” Eridan, apparently, said in a huffed tone, though kept his arm tight around the smaller. Once they made it to the main street there was an all black car waiting, Eridan seemed to turn to it almost instantly. Yeah not at all sketchy. Karkat got a slow sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. His body had gone tense and ridged as he followed this man he hadn't known more than thirty minutes. This of course only got worse as he was pushed into the back of the car and Eridan slid in after him. The pompous douche-bag settled beside him and ran his hand through his obviously dyed blonde hair with a deep purple streak through it. Fussing about his hair for a good few moments, trying to get it to sit better on his head.

But for the most part they sat in silence after Karkat gave him the address. Even then he was slightly weary about giving out this information. This was where he actually lived after all. Not that he could even be completely sure they were heading that way at all. However if his luck wasn't already gone to hell being stuck in some fucking car going who knows where his phone rang. It was loud and obvious. Eridan gave him a raised brow. “Are you goin to answer that?” There was skepticism in his voice.

“Well I wasn't going to no, but since you are going to act like I am fucking snitching on you for being a gun toting jackass sure.” Karkat hissed as he answered and- it was Gamzee. Of fucking course it was him. “God, what the fuck is it now?” He answered with a slightly annoyed tone, though it was muffled Eridan could slightly make out the voice on the other end.

“ _Hey brother, I was wondering if you could motherfuckign pick up some snacks on your way over. I got a wicked case of the munchies and a 3 am snack sounds wonderful right about now”_ Gamzee spoke though the phone like it was one in the afternoon and this was just a normal request.

“Gamzee, I can't fucking pick up anything I am already half way there at this point. I don't think I can make a fucking stop because my buzzed ass sure as hell isn't driving.” Karkat spoke in that same tone but with a more tired sigh, fuck he just said the other's name. Fuck he was going to get Gamzee in some deep shit if he wasn't lucky.

“ _But karbro-”_

“I fucking said no! I will make you breakfast in the morning or whenever we wake up.” Karkat pinched the bridge of his nose before slowly glancing at Eridan. Who... for some odd reason looked like he had seen a ghost. He just watched him on the phone, wide eyed, his mouth slightly agape as it closed slowly but no sound escaped it. “Look I have to go okay? I'll see you when I get home... yeah yeah I know-” Karkat's face went a bit red as Gamzee didn't seem to want to get off the call and he was being eyed like a madman. Finally after a final goodbye and a very quiet “Yeah love ya too” Which seemed fucking ridiculous, but Gamzee had been doing that shit since they were kids. Not that it seemed odd to Karkat since his own brother did the same thing. In his mind they were just close, but to anyone else it may seem like something more. Yet Karkat had deliberately avoided saying he was possibly kidnapped over the phone, he didn't need to be shot point blank in here. Probably why everything was leather and not fabric in the car anyway.

“You... you know-w Gam?” Eridan piped up as Karkay pocketed his phone. “You know-w a fuckin' Makara?!” Eridan said this as if it was some big reveal. When in all reality Karkat had grown up with Gamzee, they had been friends since kindergarten. Yet Eridan didn't see it that way, in the world of crime the only ones worse than the Ampora's at dealing with unwanted clients or rivals was the Makara's. They were know to be ruthless in their deals and bounty hunts, but here this little shit was settled next to him. He seemed close to, not many just say 'love you' at the end of talking with an roommate. The question now was how bad did Eridan fuck up here?


	3. Chapter 3

“You... you know-w Gam? You know-w a fuckin' Makara?!” Eridan seemed almost astonished as he barked out to Karkat. His body had scooted away from him against the black leather seats, as if touching Karkat would kill him in an instant. One of those ringed hands pressed flush against the leather of his seat and the other arm was tucked tightly to his chest. Even his legs had been pulled in closer to his chest. This seemed to only annoy the smaller, he raised a pale brow with the slightest of 'tch' noise escaping his lips.

“Of course I know him, if that conversation wasn't obvious enough. Apparently not since you are asking ridiculously idiotic questions.” Karkat spoke up as he leaned back more against the leather seat, his arms crossed over himself and his shoulders hunched. Very much a more defensive position. He didn't exactly like this sudden change, what exactly was going on? He looked over the bottle blonde with almost analyzing eyes, before he started to explain further. Knowing well his question was most likely prying for information. “I have known that clown since we were in kindergarten. We grew up together here and ended up going to the same school. Honestly I don't think he has any real interest in going to classes but he likes the fact we can live together and his family has enough money he can do whatever he wants there.”

Eridan just stared a moment, those violet orbs casting over his face and then slowly to his body. Watching every fiber of his being. _He has to be lying._ Was all Eridan could think. _There was no way this shrimpy little shit had any connection to someone like Gam. Especially calling it such a close relationship._ He knew what he heard over the phone. But what id it was some other Gamzee? But he keeps calling him a clown and that last name. All Eridan knew was that he may have actually shot himself in the foot with this one. He had already given the subtle gesture that they would actually be going to that address. He couldn't risk causing a rift in an already shaky alliance between the Ampora's and Makara's. As much as it would be easier to just get rid of some guy off the street that could easily go to the cops with an armed threat he doubted that would happen. Not with him being so close to another known crime lord.

“W-well that makes thin's pretty complicated” Eridan muttered this more to himself as he stiffened up, fixing and straightening his shirt with his nose held high in the air. “And here I thought you w-were actually kinda cute. For someone so easily riled up” He said this so casually with his palms facing up and his shoulders shrugging. “But if Gam already has his claw-ws in ya then far be it from me to come in betw-ween you tw-wo.” The pompous air about his tone only fueled the aggravation the words started. Was this man actually flirting with Karkat after pointing a gun at him?! The nerve of this jackass!

“Me and Gamzee are _not_ fucking dating!” Karkat was very quick to correct this extremely major upset. However his face had grown a deeper red as he spoke. “We are just close alright, he is this dumbass happy clown that I have to make sure at the very least eats daily. I have been practically hovering over him since we were kids. I just worry about the guy.” He confessed as he glanced away with a huff. Eridan just raised a brow.

“You... w-what? You can't be serious? You are a goddamn assassins care taker? I don't know-w the guy personally but his family is pretty w-well fuckin' know-wn. They don't care if you are apart of the drug trade or not, you get in their w-way and you are gonna w-wish you w-were dead.” Eridan asked, puzzled about their relationship. Karkat just laughed.

“Gamzee?? An assassin? You can't be serious, he sells weed and smokes almost daily. He can barely remember to shower let alone have the cognitive ability to kill someone. I know his family is into some... shady shit and honestly it wouldn't surprise me if that was what they did. But I don't think my clown follows into those foot steps.” Karkat seemed actually amused by the idea, it was just a tad bit ridiculous. But Eridan looked at him, almost dead serious as he spoke.

“Oh... he nev-ver told ya? W-well sorry to beak it to you but that lov-vable clown is bullshit. I have heard of the shit he can pull, hell before my dad and his decided to be on good terms he killed a lot of our men. Almost got my dad killed back in the day by his.”

“I would know if he was killing people Eridan. I live with the guy.” Karkat corrected as he narrowed his eyes on the other.

“Has he ev-ver come home super late and in a fresh pair of clothes?”

Karkat sat there silent for a moment, thinking about the times he had seen Gamzee arrive in different clothes then what he left in.

“He probably doesn't w-wanna get you inv-volv-ved. Which means he actually giv-ves a flyin' shit about you. W-which also means if you get hurt on my w-watched I'm fuckin' dead meat. Just my luck, I find someone that Gam is fond of. I almost blew-w your fuckin' head off too.” Karkat sat as Eridan spoke, processing what he had just learned. He had known the guy since they were so young. He wondered how long this had been going on. This was a bit different than just selling weed.

But before he could completely come to terms with his best friend being a mass murderer, the car parked in front of his dorm. He looked out the window and it seems Gamzee was sitting out front at almost four in the morning now, smoking and waiting for his roommate. He glanced over at the car, that painted grin faking it as his lips were pulled into a slight confused pout. That car looked oddly familiar to the clown. The man was tall, well over six foot, maybe past 6'6” honestly. Karkat had never really asked and he doubted Gamzee would care to know that information. He had deeply tan skin under that pale mask on his face. His black locks unruly with tattoos running up and down both arms. The man stood from his spot on the porch and stopped out his blunt. Stepping almost curiously over to the car Karkat had yet to leave. Before Karkat could go for the handle the window rolled down and he about jumped.

“Look w-what I found roamin' around.” Eridan called out, sure he didn't want to piss the guy off but that didn't mean he wanted to let Gamzee know he was scared of him either. Also he already saw the damn car, he was going to know who this was. Karkat jumped and rolled his eyes, obviously annoyed. Gamzee gave a quick glance Eridan's way. Was that a glare? Karkat has never really seen Gamzee glare before. Though his half lidded eyes landed on Karkat and he leaned against the car with a very big clownish grin before speaking.

“Come here often?” Gamzee practically cooed to Karkat and the pale man went a bright red, all the way up to the tips of his ears. God this was fucking embarrassing, right after he just got done explaining that they were not a couple Gamzee pulls this shit. This got a boisterous laugh out of the clown, he moved to open the door for Karkat “Aw you get so red so easily! It's pretty motherfucking cute” Karkat just grumbled as he got out of the car, Gamzee had always been touchy so the whole slung arm around the shoulder wasn't new. Though the clown did give a longer than normal stare back. He didn't seem pleased.


	4. Chapter 4

Karkat wasn't exactly sure what to think about the nights events, he was tired and he could already feel a headache approaching him, prowling around right behind his eyes, throbbing and on the way to become a full blown migraine if he didn't at the very least get some rest soon. But instead the clown that had seemed adamant on demanding some physical affection from him was still right there. His arm right around his shoulders and a lopsided grin splayed across his features. He guided them to the kitchen, Karkat was only swaying slightly, his brain with a notable fog on it. He knew that driving would have been a shit idea, which was the reason he ubered there and planned to do the same back before this mess. Those bright red eyes looked over Gamzee's profile, this... this was his best friend. Not some murderous assassin like what Eridan was trying to sell.

They had suddenly stopped and Gamzee moved to finally let him go. He had been so quiet. That just wasn't right for the clown, unless he was spaced out. If either one of them were silent for too long something was seriously wrong. Karkat steadied himself against the counter next to the fridge. Those eyes locking with the deep purple orbs a moment before the clown did the same to the other end of the kitchen. Leaning against the sink and cabinets, the clown even crossed his arms, his eyes hadn't seem to leave Karkat for a good few moments. He looked focused, despite his grin it almost seemed menacing in nature. What the actual fuck was going on?! First the glare and now this?

“Fucked up big time didn't ya?” Gamzee seemed to almost snicker at himself, though only got a puzzled look in response. But before Karkat could actually question what the hell the clown was on about; he gave him a very piercing stare. Studying his expression and then over Karkat's unimpressive stature. “You aren't hurt right? Ampora normally isn't the best with people... or keeping motherfuckers alive. I don't want my best friend all filled up with bullet holes like a piece of Swiss cheese you know? Or even one bullet. Just doesn't seem like a good look for a motherfucker like you.”

“I'm not hurt, I'm fine Gamzee, damn. I can handle myself you know. I didn't even plan to have that soggy cum sock drive me home. But the fuck-trumpet made a pretty compelling argument, something I couldn't exactly refuse.” Karkat admitted before rubbing at his temples and his eyes closing softly for a good moment. Fuck his head was really starting to hurt. “Look, I am exhausted, if I don't sleep soon I won't be getting up to making jack shit for either one of us.” As Karkat's hand moved through his hair, trying to keep his head steady and his stomach from doing flips at the pure disorientation of the world around him. Yeah he had one too many shots at the bar. He felt awful on the ride there but at least he was sitting, that kept all this down pretty well. He could hear the other shuffle but assumed Gamzee had gotten tired and decided that was good enough of a time to let Karkat be.

“Well... as long as you aren't hurt I guess.” Gamzee didn't seem very sure of his own words as he spoke up. When Karkat finally did open his eyes the taller was right there looking down at him, less than a foot between them. Pale lashes frames red eyes, his brow frowned slightly. “Come on lil motherfucker, let's get you some sleep. I still want some eggs for breakfast.” There he was, back to his old large dopey grin. It did seem to slightly comfort the Vantas. Like Everything that had just happened was some sort of dream.

* * *

“Cro, I'm home.” Came a tired voice as the tall prim and proper Eridan Ampora made his way through the front door. He didn't even bother slipping off his shoes before he flopped himself down on the couch. Looking rather dramatic in a way before he stretched out, moving his glasses up from his face to rub at his eyes. “Cro?” He called again as he sat up a moment. “I gotta talk to you a flippin' moment.” Eridan seemed almost aggravated when his brother wasn't at his call. What else could he possibly be good for? Nothing, that's what. Finally it seems the man would wonder from the staircase to the right of the couch. Glancing over at Eridan with an almost amused glance, he was rather melodramatically sprawled out as much as he physically could.

“Wvell you looked like you got hit by a bus, wvhat did it go that bad?” Cronus spoke as he swayed his way over to the back of his couch, arms folded over as he let his weight rest on them. The man had dark brown hair slicked back with an ungodly amount of gel to keep it all perfectly in place. He wore a plane white t-shit with washed out blue jeans. The man was about the same height as Eridan if a little bit shorter if they weren't counting hair height. He had those same strange colored violet eyes, it was a trait that seemed to be limited to the Ampora blood line. Right above his left brow he had two small jagged scars from a fight he was in when starting with the family business. His eyes looming over his little brother, just waiting to see what has gotten him in a mood.

“No those dopes took w-whatever w-we had to offer, not like they had a choice anyw-way.” Eridan waved the notion off. He wouldn't be coming home if he failed a deal anyway. Their father would kick his ass for his insolence. They both knew that. “You ev-ver heard of someone w-with the name V-vantas?” Cronus had been doing this a hell of a lot longer than Eridan, he knew the Makara's better too, granted he stayed pretty clear regardless of having to actually meet with them.

“I knewv one in college. He was a fuckin' prude too, but he had a nice ass. It wvas a cryin' shame really.” The man laughed a bit at his own jab at a person that wasn't anywhere in the vicinity. “Wvhy? Did ya meet him? Did he say anythin' about me?” _What fucking desperation_ Eridan thought as his lip curled upwards in disgust. He had quite a bit of disdain for his brother's rather annoying and needy persona he seemed to adopt. How their dad raised _HIM_ as the successor to the family business was beyond Eridan.

“No, this guy is w-way too young for you. I think he's my age. He is apparently close with Gam.” Eridan said as he looked up at the other through those thick glasses perched on the bridge of his nose. There was a noticeable pause and thoughtful look that crossed the man's features. That normally smug mouth pulled off into a slight frown, with both corners pointing downward. Eridan decided to continue on the events of the night. “W-well I didn't mean to start stirrin' shit up, but he w-wasn't cooperatin' with some simple instructions. So I decided to intimidate V-Vantas into lettin' me borrow-w his phone. I just ain't so sure if he is goin' to go cryin' to Gam.” Cronus opened his mouth to speak but Eridan cut him off. “He ain't just one of the jackasses he got hooked on some laced w-weed either. W-when he got off the phone with the guy they exchanged “lov-ve ya”. W-who the fuck does that?”

“So... did he at least havwe a nice ass?”

“Cro! This is serious.”

“Yeah but if ya are gonna die, it wvould be a nice last sight. I can't help you wvith those psychos. Kurloz alone scares the shit out of me, and he does the fiances. But that damn mute knowvs some shit I swvear. Pretty sure he wvould of killed me if I didn't leavwe Mituna alone. If it's anythin' like that sort of fixation I wvouldn't bother.”

None of this was exactly helping settle Eridan's worry. He stepped in it this time didn't he? There was no one that was going to bail him out either. He supposed he could try to avoid that pretty pale face. But something was in the pit of his stomach was telling him that he hadn't seen the last of Karkat Vantas.


End file.
